I Am Nothing But Emotion, No Human Being, No Son, Never Again Son
CD/LP, Blue Soldier Records/Pocket Records/Pastel Music/Love Da Records/Gold Typhoon Music, 2010
Tracklisting
01.Blue Soldier Night
02.Holy Dungeon
03.The Greatest Love of All
04.Open Arms of Gold
05.Nana
06.Court My Eyes Alone
07.Glaslights
08.Messed-up Girl ballad version
09.No One’s Child
10.Your Kingdom
11.You’ll Come Home Again
12.Grandiosity
13.Lonely in Gold
All songs written by Maximilian Hecker. All songs performed and produced by Maximilian Hecker. Mastered by Darius van Helfteren at Amsterdam Mastering, Amsterdam.
Maximilian Hecker about the album:
»In 2008, I reached a point at which I was no longer able to find any satisfaction in my career. I felt that, since the decision I had taken seven years earlier to make music my profession, I had seldom been successful in expressing genuine emotion in concerts or studio recordings. I felt myself to be constricted in a corset of perfectionism and conventions – partly self-inflicted, partly dictated by outsiders. Retrospectively, I realized that a large part of what I had achieved on stage and in the studio had been only a rudimentary excerpt of my feelings, that the channel to my soul felt as if it had been obstructed in such recordings and live performances.
It was a series of cathartic and at the same time traumatic experiences – including my encounter with a Japanese woman called Nana in Tokyo in November 2008 – that heralded for me what I call the »decomposing mode«: in order to »survive«, I started to destroy all the suffocating elements in my environment – I liberated myself from narcissistic demands, stopped shaving, wore jogging pants as everyday clothing, distanced myself from women, even from the idea of finding true love one day. I began to make street music again, or rather, to »meditate publicly«, up to six hours at a time, just singing if no one was specifically listening to me – for this was the only way to keep open the path to my soul. And eventually, I began to record my new songs at home, shortly after composing them, using the simplest equipment (often only one room microphone). Exposed to all the street noise and »dirt«. Holding on to the moment of inspiration. My soul, my pure emotions immortalised on tape. All rational processes that before had deadened and delayed my feeling – such as arranging, determining the instrumentation, writing succinct lyrics (the lyrics on the album derive largely from a stream of consciousness emanating directly from my heart, improvised at the moment of recording) and finally the professional recording – these were eliminated. Just the essence remains: the pure emotion, the pure, artistic innocence.«
在2008年, 我感到自己无法在事业上找到满足感。我觉得自七年前我决定以音乐作为事业之后, 则无法再于演唱会或录音室中表达到真正的情感。我似被困于完美主义及传统的紧身衣之中 --- 部份出于自己, 部份来自其它人。回顾以往, 我发现我在台上及录音室中所做到的, 只是我情感不完整的引用, 我的灵魂就好像受这些录音及演唱阻挡着。那是一连串净化同时亦伤痛的经历 --- 包括在2008年十一月于东京与一个名叫Nana的日本女人之相遇 --- 传达了一个我称之为的「分解模式」的讯息给我, 为了「生存」, 我开始消除我环境中所有使我窒息的元素 --- 我把自己从自我陶醉的需要中解放出来, 停止刮胡子, 每天穿着运动裤, 远离女人, 或有天会找到真爱的想法。我开始再制作街头音乐, 或者应该是进行「公开冥想」, 每天6个小时, 就好像无人在听地唱 --- 这是唯一可以打通到我灵魂深处之路的方法。后来, 我开始在家录制我的新歌, 就是作曲之后, 随即用最简单的器材录制 (很多时就只是一支咪)。曝露于街头音乐及「尘土」之中。抓住有灵感的时刻。我的灵魂, 我纯真的情感在录音带上变成不朽。所有以前握杀及阻碍我情感的理性程序 – 如乐器选用, 编排, 撰写精炼歌词 (唱片内的歌词大部份都是在录音时, 我内心深处触发出来的感觉) 以及最后的专业录制 --- 都一一省掉。剩下的只有精髓: 纯正的情感, 艺术的纯净。